When
the International financier Thom Hobbes expanded the sales of
Traveller’s Shampoo Bar Soap™ to
the billions of recently mobile unwashed unwilling to put liquid
shampoo in their rucks before setting out across deserts and pampas
to labor sweltering in cities his ability to fund a constellation of
glistening space orbs advertising Shampoo Bar Soap increased with his
billions of rubles. In months Eartha was orbited by encapsulated
defense wombs for nurturing the first line of malware defense.
In
the midst of 14 feet of solid ice; frozen heavy water, the waveform
series of encrypted protocols barely reach the awareness field of the
chess baby. Distant galactic patterns were black neutrinos and white
photons impressed upon the baby's brain where implicit grandmaster
programs sifted through countless permutations searching for
incipient rogue black hat program viruses in the quanta reaching
across normal space and even through quantum no-space to infect the
planetary systems circuitry of any sentient civilization in the line
of communication. In the rotating spherical chess wombs brilliant
babies destined for abortion were transported and given a home.
The chess babies trained from before birth with a constant stream of consciousness input of all historical chess games interpreting quantum logic reality until they became too old. Extended infantile consciousness perished around age three when the differences between mind as a game for-itself and empirical sensor awareness grew to present conflicting claims to thought. Babies aged beyond the purely computational and intuitive stage found it difficult to think solely to meet the extended reality where alien civilizations sending holistic malware across the Universe could be encountered. Alien malware could be encoded within the full spectrum of physical electromagnetic waveforms. Baby's brains needed to be adaptable without distraction by empirical concerns to meet any possible threats..
Sentient civilizations taking global A.I. systems with malware drew invaders to the new home even as machinery was converted to conform the world to alien design suitable for predators. The chess babies fought the takeover existing as coefficient of adversity to subdue in return for the conditioned response of nurturing game-piece love. Chess babies defended the Earth from alienware viruses until retirement to conventional human chess training around the age of four on the planet Eartha, in particular.
Hal the chess baby top I.Q. gun was elected most popular chess baby gunner by the computer network audience that carefully monitored his work knocking down alien viruses. Thus his transition to Moscba Chess Home for retired chess baby swag was easy enough; his many fans brought product endorsement opportunities and his likes continued to increase over the years that he lived in a sensory deprivation tank with nothing input to his electrodes besides chess games, chess theory and Youtube videos. When Hal reached the ripe old age of 18 his millions of fans insisted he take control of the Presidency of the World Chess Federation of Free Interesting Persons. He stood for election and upon taking office made his second retirement from chess having achieved a F.I.D.O. chess rating of 4000 surpassing by 1000 points the previous record holder Sicilia Gambit’s 2997 high mark.
From the WCFIP presidency to taking the Presidency of the Disunited States was just a matter of waiting for Hal. He still needed to wait until age 34 to be elected to make an imprint upon history on a larger scale. He would have live video trick streams of his work. Goading the newest social order into behavioral Utopian reconstruction was just a matter of chess. Through the darkest hours of the soul anyone could think of chess openings and know that once they were to start the game would be finished one way or another. Mankind need to learn not to cheat. It would be possible to overcome the impossible. Chess baby felt his sense of destiny and knew the Lord was providential for all; the good , the bad and the ugly. Hal would kiss even the ugly among his adoring fans.
In
his years of chess and Youtube training immersed in a sensory
deprivation tank Hal learned the principles of good government that
would keep civilization from dying. A balanced budget, living within
one's means, traditional moral norms without slippage into the dark
side of the force, maintaining public infrastructure, quality mass
public education, secure borders, adequate taxation on the rich,
civil rights for individuals with equal protection of law; these
principles were constant requisites akin to operating systems
parameters required for human health. Too high of blood pressure, too
little food or too much, excess high or low temperatures, etc-such
fundamental principles that continued too much time bring sickness
and death. In the course of human civilizations that fell exceeded or
failed to continue within the healthy political habitation
boundaries. Yet Hal found they also perished from aggressive war, too
great of territorial expansion and most notably, invasive species. In
Hal's life the malware of invasive species had never stopped assault
upon Eartha's computational artificial intelligence networks. The
defense of Eartha A.I. systems from alien takeover was Hal's primary
reason for seeking the leadership of the survivors of the temporary
collapse of Eartha's ecosphere as President of the Disunited States.
Thomas
Hobbes' financial success with biodegradable shampoo bar soap so
gentle on hair enabled him to bring an end to the murder of the
unborn-a savage, primitive procedure developed in the United States
that enabled women to flush their responsible for pregnancy and moral
integrity along with their conscience. Thom Hobbes agreed with
Watson-'Quamdiu
vivet crescit;
life
is
never
done growing'
.Hobbes's
love for the female gender motivated his quest for a medical
procedure to exfiltrate unwanted fetuses instead of murdering them
with barbaric osterization or suction. He was successful in the
enterprise.
Hobbes
found a pioneering surgical inventor that created an efficient way of
exfiltrating a fetus and relocating it to a micro-microbiological
storage vessel. His appeal to women to give up the barbaric,
unconscionable slaughter of the innocents was made easier with
evidence that the unborn could be made to learn chess-and much more
with in utero signaling input. To murder thinking beings-even
physically humble beings-made even the heartless think twice about
killing someone that was somewhat of a sentient peer.
Hobbes
was able to save hundreds of thousands of unborn humans in his
cryo-containers sent to a long-term cryo-storage facility deep in a
lunar crater with a constant near absolute zero temperature where
they would wait to repopulate Eartha or a comparable human-friendly
environment if the unthinkable disaster of complete eco-collapse
decimated the world. Occasionally there were couples seeking children
of their own that were given permission to adopt a fetus.
Hal
had been the prototype for fetal chess instruction, and was the first
to be placed in an Eartha orbiting defense pod. His infantile mind
was able to discern regular from anomalous synthetic waveform
arrivals and sort through possible attacks upon the world's
computational architecture with the objective immunity of pure
bioware for-itself and for-others.